Question

Activity 2: Pablo and Paige (Power in Relationships)

After reading the conversations, answer the following questions:

Analyze the role power plays in this relationship. Hint: think of distributive (either/or),

integrative (and/both), or power denial.

Identify Paige’s RICE currencies.

Identify Pablo’s RICE currencies.

Who occupies a higher power position and lower power position in conversation 1? Make sure

to give concrete reasons to support your answer.

Who occupies a higher power position and lower power position in conversation 2? Make sure

to give concrete reasons to support your answer.

Suggest ways the power might be better balanced in this relationship. Be specific.

Background

Pablo and Paige have been married for ten years and have two children together. Before they had kids, both Pablo and Paige worked full-time. Now they have a five-year-old daughter and a two-year-old son. Pablo works part-time, to help take care of the kids, and Paige’s salary is high enough for them to manage. The following conversations are just examples of the many they’ve had about money.

Conversation #1 (At a party, in front of their friends)

Paige: We had the best vacation in Mexico. That’s the most relaxed I’ve been in a long time.

Pablo: Are you kidding me? You were so worried about spending too much money. I can’t believe you just said that.

Paige: I wasn’t worrying about money; I just didn’t want you to overdo it. It’s not like we have tons of cash just lying around.

Pablo: I just wish you were willing to spend more money when we’re on vacation. That’s when you’re supposed to have fun! I didn’t want to worry about the cost of every little thing.

Paige: Well, you don’t have to worry about it: I’m the one who pays the bills.

Pablo: $5000 is not that much to spend on a vacation.

Paige: Easy for you to say. It would take you a year to save up that much money, and you’re willing to blow it in a week.

Pablo: That’s not true. I work plenty. Besides, I thought you wanted me to be around more with the kids. I can’t make a ton of money and do that, too.

Conversation #2 (Alone at their home)

Paige: I see you bought Caitlin more video games today.

Pablo: Yeah, they’re brand new—they just came out today.

Paige: I wish you’d check with me before you buy that much stuff. Our cash flow is kind of low right now.

Pablo: It’s not that much. Besides, you’re getting that extra check this week. I figured that would cover it.

Paige: Well, we should have at least discussed it. These are decisions we should make together.

Pablo: You mean I need to get your permission before I do anything. I feel like I’m asking for allowance or something. I should be able to make financial decisions on my own.

Paige: You can, but we at least need to talk about it beforehand. Instead, you buy a bunch of stuff and you don’t even see if we have enough in our checking account.

Pablo: Well, I can’t stand not having any say over how the money gets spent. Just because you make more than I do doesn’t mean that I don’t get to decide once in a while.

Paige: And I don’t like having all the pressure to make all that money. It’s not like it’s the greatest job in the world. I wouldn’t keep it except we—mostly you—spend too much, so I stay.

Pablo: I could start working more. Paige: No, we’re not doing that. Pablo: You can’t have it both ways?

Paige: What both ways? All I am is a paycheck to you, and you’re just the person who spends it.

Answer 1

Ans. 1

RICE for Paige are his earning, control over family and communication skills to put his mean in front of Pablo.

RICE of Pablo are, her care towards children, her job, and communication skill to accept her intention by Paige.

Ans. 2

A-In first conversation, Paige occupies higher position because he is showing the power of his earning as well as spending. The Pablo is positioning lower because her earnings and jobs is seems to be lower according to Paige.

B-In the conversation second, Pablo occupies higher position because she is showing control over family and earnings of Paige and don’t want take accountability. Paige is positioning low than Pablo because he is earning much than Pablo but not able to discuss about spending.

Ans. 3

The power distribution does not only depends on earnings, various factors influence power distribution like care of family, direct intervention in family affairs, communication between family members and work allocation.

So the balance of power depends on the various factors but both person participate in family matters so both experience responsibilities, while work allocation is also important because many of us believes that working at home is easy than going outside but it is not completely true, both work are tough and both person must understand the problems of each other’s works.

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