You are not alone in this Roxy.
I am an American Jew myself too and I live in New Jersey as a matter of fact.
I agree with you that Israel is not a bed of roses and I believe all of these human rights violations and war crimes that have been "performed" by a "legitimate" Israeli government are a million times more serious than some Palestinian faction retaliating actions.
Young kids do not commit suicide because it is kinda ...cool!
They do this because they see that there is no hope left for them.
I am glad that there a couple of Jewish organizations that see that way too.
I am not saying that this is right or anything, OK?
However I think that this whole idea of "a modern Israel" is 100 percent wrong.
Where is our Messiah? He should lead us to a beautiful Israel without wars and bloodshed and American Aid from the Goys, don't you think so?
Sarah