Question

Domestic Abuse Myths

Five mistakes we make when we talk about Rihanna and Chris Brown's relationship.

In your post,
1. What myth do you think is the most dangerous?
2. Why are myths so dangerous? (Hint: keeps us from addressing the real issues)
3. What are the real issues? (Hint: power and control is a behavior that is related to how we think about relationships - dominance and inequality)
4. What is love and how is this simply NOT love?
5. How do we teach each other about what is love and what is not love?

Answer 1

1. What myth do you think is the most dangerous?

Myth1 is most dangerous: "It was a domestic argument, and she (Rihanna) provoked him (Chris).

Reason: This myth tries to hide an act of violence faced by Rihanna in terms of mere argument.

2. Why are myths so dangerous?

Myths are dangerous because they keeps us from addressing the real issues. For example, we have seen Rihanna's bruised and bloodied face on the front pages of newspapers but it was shown by Chris that it was mere a domestic argument. How just an argument may lead to bruises and bloodied face.

3. What are the real issues?

I think the real issue in case of Chris & Rihana was that Chris wanted to use his power to control the behavior of Rihanna. He wanted to dominate the relationship over Rihanna as Rihanna was quite younger and also rich.

4. What is love and how is this simply NOT love?

Love is a mix of emotions, behaviors, and beliefs associated with strong feelings of affection, protectiveness, warmth, and respect for another person.

This is not a love in case of these couples because a love always forgives, there is no scope of violence at all if you truly love.

5. How do we teach each other about what is love and what is not love?

Showing emotions of care, respect, protection is love. Dominating other in terms of arguments or any other physical sense where one is hurting another one is not love. In this way we can teach.