Question

Many psychologists (self-included) have come to view self-esteem as "not all it's cracked up to be." Not an unalloyed good for the individual. Consider the following:

1) Is it possible to have a good sense of self-worth without showing traits and behaviors associated with egotism?

2) How do we help children value themselves while also preparing them to fail or need to improve in some areas of life?

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Answer 1

Self-esteem is the overall worth a person feels about oneself. It’s about valuing and appreciating oneself for what they are.

1. There is a confusion about people who exhibit high self-esteem as egotism, in fact, both are different. When someone has high self-esteem, they tend to be very assertive as well which should not be mistaken for ego. There will be a little bit of egotism which won’t be in a scale of hurting others. This is also more closely related to existentialism where individuality will be mistaken for non-conformity or being egoist.
2. Children need to be helped in this aspect by making them understand about the difference between valuing their self while respecting and giving room for others to grow. Children will be normally egocentric and they want them to be recognised and appreciated all the time. They may not understand this is not a good practice. So, they will be very fragile and they won’t be able to accept failures easily. Parents play a major role in shaping this character by giving the children enough opportunity to experience and learn to inculcate this character because charity begins at home and behaviours and attitudes are picked up from the parents.