Question

Message Startegies: Routine Requests; Revising for Conciseness [LO-1] Chapter 6 critique the followiing closing paragraphs, how would you rewrite each to be concise, courteous, and specific?

10-18 To schedule an appointment with one of our knowledgeable mortgage specialists in your area, you can always call our hotline at 1-800-555-8765. This is also the number to call if you have more questions about mortgage rates, closing procedures, or any other aspect of the mortgage process. Remember, we're here to make the home-buying experience as painless as possible.

Answer 1

The sentences can be restructured in the following manner to make it more appealing, concise, courteous, and specific:

"We are here are to provide you with the best possible home-buying experience. For any queries related to the mortgage process, please feel free to call us on our hotline at 1-800-555-8765. You can also fix a face to face appointment with our mortgage specialists to clear all of your doubts".

_____

Explanation:

Above sentences offer both formal and informal approach of communication. People who are looking for buying new homes (on mortgage) are offered the opportunity to have a direct/indirect conversation with the mortgage specialists.